Out of the Crib

Living in an orphanage waiting for somebody to take her out of the crib.

She now has a Mommy and Daddy and could not be happier.

                                She loves pretty things. Scarves, boa's, flowers and pretty dresses.

She also loves playing and daring things and her Daddy.

A Mommy that loves her beyond words.

For those that do not know, she was adopted about four months ago. The parents went to China to get her and their lives changed forever. I haven't heard any complaints, and don't expect to. 
To see more pictures go to Cora   or Jim

Today was my Monday

Today I went to a doctor that I only see once a year. When the automatic call came, “A member of your family has an appointment May 25th at 10:30 AM and the doctor has moved since your last visit. He is located at 111 So 11th Ave. To confirm this appointment, please press one. I’m frantically trying to find a pen and paper to write down the new address, and she wants me to press one. I unwittingly picked up the remote control and kept pressing one and she kept going on about not understanding my response. I finally realized I was changing channels on the TV. I finally pressed the one on the phone so she would shut up. Now what did she say that address was.  I think it was 111 So 11th Ave.
So today I go to the doctor and left a half-hour early in case I had trouble finding it. It was raining and wipers are going back and forth and I’m squinting trying to read the signs and numbers on the buildings, and watching my rear view mirror to make sure I’m not holding anybody up. I can’t find it. Thank goodness I left a half-hour early. I finally gave up and found a place to park. I had one of their cards in my purse and had the phone number so I called the place. She said, It is in the big tall building by the hospital and we are on third floor. I finally found it, and walk over to the elevator and it only has two floors.  I noticed an office on the first floor so I went in there and asked if she knew where this doctors office is.
She said, “Yes, it’s on the third floor”. And I said, “ Your elevator only goes up to the second floor”. She said, “Pardon me”?  I said, “I mean this building only has two floors”. She said, “This side only has two floors, but the other side has three floors”. I am thinking that I have to go drive around the building and find another parking place. I guess she read my mind because she said, “You can get there from here, just go through those big doors and go through that hall and then through those doors and you will see the elevators.” I got through the door and down the hall and through the other big doors and up the elevator and now where is it. There are no names on the doors. I go through a door and people are in the waiting area and I ask if anybody knows where Dr. T. office is. A lady said I was in the right place. It was 10:30.  And I sat down by the lady and told her what I had gone through trying to find it and she said she had just gone through the very same thing. She was as exasperated as I was. We discussed it extensively. Now I’m not feeling quite so dumb. I waited for 45 minutes before the nurse called me in. I told her about my trouble finding the place and she said, “You know everybody tells me they have trouble finding it. I told her they need to put a big neon sign out there that says, “THIS IS THE PLACE” She said they had just moved in and they are working on what to do about the problem. Now I have to go every 6 months and get a shot. I hope I remember how to find it.

Remembering

Remembering

 

Do you remember when?
The noon meal was called dinner and the evening meal was called supper?
You went outside to the toilet and ate inside?
Folks sweetened their tea, but never added lemon to make it sour?
Brick of chili was a Saturday night treat, after a day spent in town?
Folks said: “I’m much obliged “ instead of “thank you?”
Seeing a picture show for a dime was delightful entertainment?
Red Christmas socks were hung near the Red Cedar Christmas tree?
Cardinals sang their melodies, perched above the snowy landscape?
The aroma of peanuts roasting in the oven excited the palate?
The handshake was a binding contract?
Eating snow ice cream was a winter treat?
Blue-bib overalls were considered fancy dress?
Horses, instead of tractors pulled wagons?
Piggly Wiggly was popular as Wal-Mart nowadays?
Western movies were shown at the Mecca and Camera theaters?
Every Saturday night at 11:30, previews were shown at the Aggie Theater?
The Glencoe cotton gin was like money in the bank?
Gene Autry did a show at the Campus Field House?
Where did I lay my glasses?

Written by Bill Boyd
Perkins, Okla  

Let me put a little bug in your ear

Let me put a little bug in your ear.

We keep hearing how rampant the bedbugs are in the world and they are rapidly spreading across the country. It has been announced that if you stay in a hotel you can pick them up and take them home in your luggage. I stay out of hotels so I thought I had everything covered.
I made a disturbing discovery today. I went to the mailbox and had a small catalog among other junk mail. I brought it in and opened the catalog and before my eyes sat a little brown bug that looked for all the world to be a possible bedbug. He was dead in about two seconds flat. I didn’t take time to examine him and he was too flat after his sudden death for an exam.
Even if it was a bedbug, what are the odds of two bedbugs in the same catalog and doesn’t it take two to tango or whatever they call it in bug land. But what if it was a girl bug and laid eggs in the catalog.  I thought of everything. The catalog ended up in the garbage can. Sorry Woman’s World. Now don’t send me any more catalogs.

How Old Are You

 

Age is a funny thing. It’s so important to everybody. It starts around three. Ask a three-year-old how old they are and they stick up three fingers and they are so proud of it and pleased that you asked.
When they reach five they like to add one half to it. I’m five and a half they tell you. When they reach ten they like to say they are ten going on eleven. The sixteenth birthday is a very special milestone and eighteen is even better.
Finally they reach the magic year of twenty-one.  You feel as though you have finally arrived, but why doesn’t anybody notice.  Life moves along rather rapidly and they reach thirty. That calls for a special birthday party. You're  almost over the hill. Then the memory starts to fade a bit and you stay thirty for a couple years. I mean some people do that, not me of course.
When you reach forty you hope nobody will notice. Fifty is almost  forgotten or at least you wish folks would just forget about it, but your family or friends will not let it lie.
One day you wake up and you’ve reached sixty. You really are over the hill. Nobody cares how old you are because most of your friends are about the same age, so it isn’t mentioned very often. Finally you reach eighty. You have another one of those special birthday parties. Now you begin to get a different attitude about age. You start acting like the three-year-old. You’re pretty pleased that God let you live this long. You start saying you’re eighty and a half.  I am eighty-two going on eighty-three. When and if I reach 90 I will be so thankful I’m over the hill and not under it. That is, if I remember what a hill is.
The moral of the story is, don’t take ‘age’ too seriously, it won’t last.  

Out of the Mouths of Old Codgers

I found this gem in the daily newspaper in the section called "Letters From Our Readers".

Smart is as Stupid Does

To the editor-----Upon reading in the May 6th Yakima Herald-Republic about the teenager who received a 27 year sentence for killing another boy because he thought he was a rival gang member. I was reminded of something I discovered as a teenager myself. It goes like this:
"When you're stupid but know you're stupid, then you're really kind of smart. But when you're stupid and don't know you're stupid, then you're really stupid."
  I like to think I fell into the first category. I had a few friends surely in the second. Later in life, much later, I discovered a corollary. "If you're smart and don't know you're smart, then you're still kind of stupid. But if you're smart and know you're smart, look out! You're about to do something very stupid."
 After reading about the overpaid CEOs, I suspect they, or their board of directors, fall into the last category.
                                                                                                                   Dick Sproul
                                                                                                                   Yakima

Source: Yakima Herald-Republic

I am not sure if Dick Sproul is an old codger, but I have a feeling he has been around the block a couple times.
When I read this I said, "Dang! I wish I would have said that".

Drowsy Day

 

About the only challenge in my life these days is the daily crossword puzzle. It goes rather smoothly most days. My walls have nothing to say so I don’t have much to write about. The sun came up and a cloud or two passed over.

When I retired about the first thing I did was buy a computer. I was about the only person I knew that had one at that time. All I knew how to do was plug it in. Kenny (son) had one and knew a few things about them so he came over and got the thing running. I lived and breathed computer for the next ten years. I learned about email and chatting with other people. At that time there were all kinds of chat rooms where you could meet people. I met lots of people my age, both men and women.

We kept in touch and it was fun. Now all my, long ago friends, just up and died one by one or I lost contact somehow. People would send you every joke that was ever heard of until you got so sick and tired of them, you finally just quit reading them. I also printed out and saved some of the stuff. I have been weeding out my saved junk and ran across some of the old goofy things I had saved. I think the most favorite thing to do was to make fun of rednecks. We’ve come along way, but lest we forget let me remind you of a few.

Martha Stewart Tips for Rednecks

Never take a beer to a job interview.
Always identify people in your yard before shooting them.
It’s considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
If you have to vacuum the bed, it’s time to change the sheets.
Even if you’re certain that you are included in the will, it is still rude to drive the U-Haul to the cemetery.

 You know you’re a redneck when……..

You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
You burn your yard rather than mow it.
The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don’t want it.
You come back from the dump with more than you took.
You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
You’ve been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
Your kids take a siphon hose to school for show and tell.
You think a Hot Tub is a stolen indoor plumbing fixture.
You go to the stock races and don’t need a program.
You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
You have a rag for a gas cap.
You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Cool Whip on the side.
Your working TV sets on top of your non-working one.
You thought the unibomber was a wrestler.
You’ve used the ironing board as a buffet table.
You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
You thing fast food is hitting a deer at 65 miles an hour.