Stuff Happen

Stuff happens. I was reclined in my recliner when out of the blue a big brown spider found his way upon the arm of my chair. We eyeballed each other for a nano-second. I leaped out of my chair without the aid of the chair lift, walker, cane or any of those aids for the disabled. I made three giant leaps through the living room, kitchen and utility room, where I found the fly slayer. I returned very cautiously. That spider was on death row, he just didn’t realize it, or maybe he did because he was now on the lam. He had taken a hike so I decided to wait him out. Sure enough here he comes again. He is on the arm of another chair this time. I grab the swatter, take aim and swat, but I didn’t have a very good bead on him and it just knocked him across the room. At least he will have a good headache. I got up to look for him and there he was, just lying there, waiting for his doom very motionless. I took care of his doom. Bam! Bam! Bam! I wanted to make sure he was dead as possible and while I was beating him up I heard a ping sound against the wall. I had begun to calm down a little so I gingerly step over and bend down to get a better look and it was a little brown rock. The spider is still on the lam.